'Caught Up In a Dream

I don't know what it is, who you are or what you do to me, but is that venom within you that intoxicates me, leaves me breathless, mouth mute and heart wide open.

After almost one year I can seem to shake the thought of you, every time you are back I fall right back into those empty arms of lust.

You wake up the demons inside of me, while I get lost into a sweet familiar serendipity.

Our vulnerable hearts lead us to an intense love embrace, but the cynicism within you breaks the odds, the possibilities, and me I just want more; part of me wants to change you, part of me wants to make you mine, but my hands are tied and my words I swallow in sorrow silence inside.

Is the things you do, the words you say, why is it so hard to let go of what you cant change?

Like the forbidden fruit of Eden your venomous bitter taste; burns like fire under the rain, penetrating deep inside like a bullet to the heart. 

You are like no sunshine when you are gone.

Expectations are inevitable to disguise.

I am caught up in a dream.

An endless dream without you in vain.

'The Skepticism of LOVE'

'First comes work, then comes marriage' at least that's what they say, but why have many become so cynical about the whole idea of finding that one true love? They say, why get hooked for life? when you can be motivated by you own self-fulfillment?

'We have been taught pursuing happiness is part of sharing its with someone else', but in a society where individualism is one of the most common factors that eventually leads to attention seekers, you often find those who give in so easily and those who get back even easier. By this means I do not only refer to sex, but the simplest way of reciprocating attention, by listening. Some want to be heard, while others want to be talked to and others want to be felt physically and emotionally.

But in a transitional city like Dubai. lead by capitalism and success, most of us prioritize finding that significant other, as the second, third or forth most important factor after work, making money and being successful; which surprisingly is most commonly practiced by women.

Women have evolved, we are no longer dependent on men, we depend and rely on no one ourselves, our self-fulfillment, satisfaction and actions.

Therefore it makes me wonder, how far have we've come, to become so self-determined and appreciate the monetary success more than finding our own happiness and having that want to share it with someone else?
Is it too hard to believe in a materialistic society you can't find love, peace and inner happiness before a successful career?

Call me a romantic fool, but I stand for my belief in love and I believe those who practice appreciation starting from themselves are the happiest no matter what comes along.

'Because in the end you will only regret the chances you didn't take, opportunities you let go and love you didn't loose yourself on'.

'The Cynic Romantics'

I cant help but wonder the irony of one who has been hurt and holds on to his pain reflected in his/her cynical disbelief on love.
Throughout my 6 years in Dubai I have met and seen those who have been hurt, those who enjoy hurting and those who hurt in reciprocation of being hurt.
I have seen those who see the opposite sex as meat and carelessly pretend to taste and digest, as the bitter taste of lust stays in their mouths.
One way or the other I have seen pain, regret and vulnerability that just leads to an endless circle of emptiness; so it makes me wonder when does this endless carrousel of unfulfilled inner-satisfaction gets to an end?

I have seen and learned that being cynical about love does not only hurt one but those around us, one is not only an influence but a transmitter of negativeness; and yes its inevitable but not unchangeable.
If having your heart broken, being cheated on or anything potentially worst, has been your trigger to cynicism; its has been, it has happened, let it be, let it go, let it flow. 
Learning to forgive without regret is the key to a cleansing restart, leaving the past where it belongs. 
Therefore, don't misjudge the potential future opportunities for fear of getting hurt.
Be open to the idea of something better, something unexpected is bow to happen and be surprised that not all men and women are the same we are just sinking in the same societal circle of mistrust. 

Dedicated to all my cynical friends who once gave up on love, who threw the towel and gave their backs to an open door. 
I know you will remember this when love suddenly knocks on your door at a time and place that you least expected.

'La vie est fabuleuse' when you expect without expectations.
xoxo